Wednesday, November 6, 2013

How do I do it?

Of all the things I hear all the time that really drives me batty, "I don't know how you DO it" is pretty high up there on the top of the list.

I mean, really.

You say this as if there is some sort of "opt out" option when it comes to parenting. Like God has a customer service counter where you can bring back your defective child and say "I'd like to upgrade to a better operating system. Do you have this in a blonde?".

Come on, people. It doesn't work that way.

"How do I do it?"

I just "do".

I "do" it because my kids are my everything, and I would "do" anything for them. I don't parent an "autistic child" or a "neurotypical one"- I parent Sammie and Charlie, my flesh and blood, perfect exactly as they are.

Is it easy? Nope. Parenting seldom is. But is it worth it? More than words can say.

Sometimes, I am running on fumes. Between school, meetings, therapies, IEPs, research, doctors appointments, and- you know- parenting another child, the days are often long and sometimes difficult.

We navigate a complex diet, massive sensory issues, and a couple of strong and persistent personalities, and we just try to do our best.

99% of the time, we do.

We survive.

Most of the time, we even thrive.

But we don't "do" it because of some deep seeded, altruistic motive. We do it because there just aren't any options.

Parenting has an automatic no refunds or returns policy.

And you don't know what you're going to get.

In the blink of an eye, everything can change all at once, and your expectations get smushed into the ground.

So you make up new dreams, and you create a new reality.

Because their bright, smiling faces make it all worthwhile. In fact, it makes you forget that you ever thought you wanted something different to begin with. 

"How do I do it?" is the wrong question.

The real question is this:

"How could I not?"

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